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Pharisee Husband

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Main Scriptures: Matt.23:1-4

More Scriptures: Lk.12:1, Lk.13:15, 1 Tim.4:2

Then spake Jesus to the multitude and to his disciples, saying the scribes and the Pharisees sit in Moses’ seat. All therefore whatsoever they bid you observe, that observe and do; but do not ye after their works: for they say and do not. For they bind heavy burdens and previous to be borne and lay them on men’s shoulders; but they themselves will not move them with them with one of their fingers (Matt.23:1-4).

Many times as husbands and head of our families, we complain about sheep. We get angry and unhappy that they do not obey us. We often remind them that they are disobedient. But what we tell them is not exactly what we practice. So, we become like the Pharisees that Jesus described in Matt.23:1-4, who put so much pressure and expect so much from the sheep without helping them to bear the burden. That is what I call the phariseetical mentality.

As the head of the family, you make demands from your wife without making any effort to assist her. She cooks for you and the family, does your laundry, takes care of the children, cleans the house and maintains your home, yet you come back home and sit in the sitting room waiting for her to serve you hot fresh meals very urgently. You do not think you should ask her how you may be of help to her. Not even a word of appreciation proceeds from your mouth. You must wake up to realize that your wife is not a slave. She is not a piece of furniture. She is God’s creation and a gift to you. Your child(ren) read and struggle to understand what is being taught. Or they struggle with their emotions, peer pressure and from physical challenges. In all of these inadequacies, you did not pray with and for them. You did not speak words of hope and encouragement. Rather what comes out of your mouth is condemnation and abuse and you expect them to be excellent. That is phariseetical.

So as the shepherd who strives to become a good and godly husband, you must understand and accept the truth about what enthrones you as the head of your family. You are not enthroned in the lives of your wife and children by reason of the fact that you are the head. You are not also enthroned in their lives because you are a man, husband and father. What gives you first place in their lives is when they see you do what you say and you embrace them as your friends. The days of “do what I say and not what I do” is over. Your wife and children will respect you and be prepared to go with you all the way when they can see and experience firsthand that you are a doer of the word of God.


·         Father, in the Name of Jesus, empower me to be the good and godly example to my sheep in all things, and at all times.

·         Father, in the Name of Jesus, deliver me from living a double life.

·         Father, in the Name of Jesus, empower me to be faithful to You, my wife and children.


I have the mind of Christ and I live by His word for the good of my wife and children because that is what makes me a good and godly husband in Jesus Name. Amen.

Published inDaily Devotionals

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